Polycule meaning part 2

It made my partner stress out because they thought they would be, like, another person for me to split my time with and split my energy with. Like, nothing actually happened. And I could have probably just as easily brought it up later. But, I mean, I had, like, a relationship, a monogamous relationship. Well, it was agreed to be monogamous in college, and I just, you know, I cheated on this person, like, a bunch of times. It was really messed up. It was, like, not okay. And because of that, I think that I kind of, like, have this fear of letting secrets become normal parts of my life. And at the same time, I was also hiding an eating disorder from my friends and family for the same period and for longer. And I think that that all kind of went together in this sort of personal psychology of secrecy that was making me difficult to be intimate with emotionally and difficult for me to be intimate with other people. And so I kind of compulsively share things now, I think, because of trying to avoid that. So I imagine that there’s probably a happy medium I’ll reach. How old are you? 26. And your partners? Vince is 27 and Dan’s 29. I think I would feel badly putting somebody who is 18 in this emotional position.

Like, I mean, everybody’s had their experiences when they were, like, in their teens, and everybody’s just kind of, like, full of hormones, and they’re, like, angry and jealous and feel things too strongly. And it’s just like, you have to have more of, like, a pragmatic approach to relationships and realize that you’re not the center of the universe and nobody else is. Most of the time when people hurt you, it’s based on their own insecurities and based on their own issues and not because the world’s out to get you. If you already kind of don’t really want to have sex at all, and then you have a lot of people for whom you’re a normal sexual partner, it compounds what would ordinarily be, like, a problem with one other human. And I guess polyamory allows for people to find other outlets for that, but it’s stressful and it’s hard.
And I know that online dating is a lot different for dudes. Like, a CIS woman on online dating is, like, absurd. It’s like you’re constantly getting hit up with people trying to get with you. But for dudes to just find a random person out of the blue, it’s a lot harder to find another partner. So I acknowledge that it’s not so simple as, I don’t want to have sex right now, go find someone else. And there’s also the emotional difficulty. Nobody wants to just find somebody on the internet to just, like, anonymously go have sex with because your long term partner doesn’t want to have sex with you. It feels like more of a responsibility just in the sense that I have more partners than each of my well, that’s not true. I would say that each of my partners has separately, but that’s actually just not true. It’s just that different people have different amounts of their sexual energy allocated to different relationships. And I feel like it’s a lot for me right now, but I understand. It’s winter, everyone’s depressed in the winter.
It’s dark all the time. I’m pretty confident that my Levito will come back around. So especially if it’s sort of like a monogamous situation with any one of my partners, it would be so much more dire and probably be a lot more of a stress on our relationship. But yeah, I wish there was an easy way to make antidepressants, not make your libido shit. That would be great because also being depressed is also kind of a bummer on your libido as well. So it’s like wishing to pick your poison. I’ll start with Alex. He’s the partner that I see every few weeks. He has one other partner named Onya, who I think is basically his primary partner. And she has two other partners. I don’t know their names, and I’ve never met them, so I just put them in as X and Y. Vince is over here. He’s seeing someone who is also dating a couple.
He’s also seeing someone named Jessa who has another partner that we’re just denoting as W because he’s never met them. And then these two dotted lines are people that he’s talking to right now who he hasn’t officially embarked in any sort of relationship with, but they’re people that he anticipates becoming intimate with in the near future. And then this dotted line, it is just my friend and we bone sometimes. Jackie’s got Kyle patch and biscuits. Dan has another partner named Laura who has a husband and a boyfriend, and another partner named Kate who is dating Dan and also a couple who I imagine he hasn’t met, hence the name. I’ve met all of everybody’s direct partners except for Laura and Kate. I’ve met Jessa B H and A. I’ve met Anya. And I’ve met Jackie. So all of my partners except for two of Dan’s partners because Laura lives in DC. But I just haven’t met Kate. Because you haven’t been dating. I met Kate this month.

I think that they’ve all met each other. I’m comfortable with everybody knowing everybody. You should meet Kate. Yeah, I’d love to. I want to meet Kate’s, baby. Ultimately, I’m just really happy to be able to love more than one person. And I have people that really love me. I was in the hospital recently with a kidney infection that ended up having some complications that led to me just being in the ICU for a week. They all came and visited me, and it really meant a lot. The people that I loved were loved me enough to just show up and hang out with me when I was in a pretty dark time. Did you have a UTI that spread to your kidney because you didn’t treat it? Did I ever? Do you want to tell people how to prevent UTIs pee after sex? Do it.
If you think you might have a UTI, don’t wait on that. Go to the doctor. I’m really happy. I love all my partners and I think that they love me and I love to see them happy when they get to love other people too, that fulfill them and take an interest in their interests that I’m not really all that interested in. You came out to your parents? Yeah. I leave about being Poly, not about any of the queer stuff. It’s for another time. These are my three boyfriends. They are all my boyfriends. I’m going to sleep now. And my mom. My mom and dad, who are pretty conservative people, didn’t really ask any questions because I was in the hospital, and they care about me and didn’t want to stress me out, I guess. And I know now that I can just bring whoever home for holidays. And they were really, really sweet to Vincent Alice when I met them. They could have made it a lot weirder. My mom was actually kind of confused by it. She was just like, so is like, Dan your main boyfriend? And these are people you just kind of casually date?
And I was like, no, I love them all. These are the people in my life. And then I fell asleep. That’s like a way less weird thing to come out as to people like my parents, there are people in their community that they can like, they understand, they can wrap their mind about that. But to say that I have relationships with several different people, that’s harder for them, I think, to conceptualize because it’s just like they don’t know anybody that does that. And it also kind of felt weird to be like, oh, also, I sleep with girls sometimes because it’s not like none of my partners right now are women. Like any of my serious partners. If I start dating a woman seriously, it’ll be like, this is my girlfriend. Not like I sometimes have casual sex with women because my parents are very Catholic and casual sex all around is not really okay. Thanks, P. After sex.